I am most sincerely M.A.D., a.k.a. reproductive rights

So after church (December 7th - aka the day most of the OCA in the Puget Sound area invaded St. K's), the hubbster and I get in the car and he immediately says to me:

"You need to stop giving such...thorough answers to questions."

Me: "ok"

LG: "you don't need to go into such detail."

Me: "ok!"

We had been talking to a gentleman of Brier, WA at the agape meal about: 1)if LG and I are related, 2) if we are the same ethnicity, 3) how long have we been married, 4) if we are planning on having children, 5) birth control, 6) how I don't want children because I teach all day, 7) how children perceive themselves in the world, and 8) how God's plans and our plans intersect and interact with one another.

Seriously - in that order!

I steadfastly exclaim that I do NOT want children in anyway shape or form right now. I am not the "Babies for Jesus" type of woman (you know, has six children and is hoping for number 7 any day now...).

I am more of the the "I need more time to explore myself and buy more shoes type of person."

I am selfish. And I am not afraid to say it.

Babies are a lot of work. They cry. They spit up all over your favorite clothes and consume a vast quantity of your budget. They *ruin* your body if: 1) you are a woman, 2) are a tiny woman who gains a lot of fat just on her own, much less eating for two, and 3) if you are woman whose skin does not stretch particularly well. (so, me basically)

For these reasons, I do not want children. They are not a priority right now - for me.

AND I DON'T CARE!

Yes, I married young. Yes, I like kids, which is why I teach (they are annoying and yet, entertaining - especially when they go home). Yes, I want to have LG's offspring because he has some excellent DNA that needs propagating.

But it doesn't mean that I need to have babies so soon.

Shoot - LG and I still *play*.

For example:

*In Whole Foods looking at baguettes*
LG: "Do you think you could joust with a baguette and break someones arm?"
Me: "Maybe..."
LG: :D "Want to try?"
Me: "Um, we are in a store..."
LG: "Come on..."
*I make a beeline to the check out counter*

Ok, maybe that is not totally how the conversation went, but do you really want me, who contemplated jousting with baguettes in a grocery store, to be a mom?

Don't answer that...

It just seems to me that *some* people out there - Orthodox or not - seem to think that having children by my age should be a priority.

In fact a fair number of people seem gung-ho on the idea.

Me: "meh"

Plus...there is the whole cancer thing.

I only have one boob, which means: 1) breast feeding = not fun, 2) cancer could come back to that boob, and 3) I will totally be lopsided after pregnancy.

I did not explain the cancer thing to the gentleman of Brier, but I was about ready to throw that in since I was being grilled. I need to learn to drink my tea fast and exclaim "oh, this needs refreshing" and sneak away.

So, in conclusion, until I become a little less selfish and vain, I am not ready for the whole kid thing.

But I have put myself on a five year plan...within five years if I get pregnant, than it is God's will.

If not, clearly God agrees that I have some growing up to do.

And that I should buy some more shoes. Or books. Or yarn!

Till then: peeps, friends, *relatives*...

BACK OFF!!!